Gone
by pristineparsnip
Summary: AU set somewhere within the Deadhead series- Matt gets on that plane and returns to America, whilst back in England, Nikki struggles to cope with how it will affect her, especially with a baby on the way, the only person she feels she can go to is Jack.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: This is my first fanfiction so please be kind! I'm considering writing this as a multi-chapter story, so please let me know if you like it and want me to continue in the reviews! Enjoy :)**

"He's gone."

Jack looked up from his microscope and spun around to see Nikki standing in the doorway. It was way past the time he should have gone home, both Clarissa and Thomas had, but there was something about a case that was bothering him, and he had decided to take another look at some of the soil samples. Nikki had gotten a call just after lunch and he hadn't seen her since then, so he had assumed she had gone too, but the small figure dwarfed by the dark door frame evidenced otherwise.

"He's gone Jack, he's really gone this time, I don't know what to do, he left his keys and a note, I don't know what to- "

Matt. Jack knew immediately what had happened. That _bastard_ had left her again, left her hurting, not knowing what went wrong, always blaming herself. Nikki couldn't even finish her sentence before she was crushed against Jack's chest, enveloped in a warm bear hug. Even wearing her heels, she didn't even reach his shoulder in height. They stayed like that for a long while, Nikki content within his arms, with Jack resting his chin on the top of her head. After what seemed like hours, Nikki felt Jack's hands on her shoulders gently untangling her from around him and holding her at arm's length to survey her face.

She looked like she'd been through hell. Her usually neat blonde hair looked lank and messy, as if she had spent the past few hours running her hands through it, her big brown eyes were red-rimmed, the eyelashes clinging together with tears, and the fire in that fierce yet beautiful little face seemed to have been extinguished. Before he even had a chance to open his mouth, her face crumpled again, and he opened his arms to her once again.

With her face pressed into his shirt, Nikki whispered so quietly he almost couldn't hear her. "And I never even got the chance to tell him about the baby."

…..

Jack's whole body froze, his feet cemented to the floor, his hands shaking with barely contained energy, a feeling he couldn't quite place. For once, the Irishman had nothing to say. "You mean to say you're... you're pregnant? Since when? How?"

She removed her face from her chest and looked him squarely in the eye. "About two months ago. I'll spare you the gory details, you took biology Jack, you know how. I never sucked up enough courage to tell him. And now I'm stuck, how the hell did I get myself into this situation? How the hell am I going to bring up a baby on my own?"

With that, Jack leant over to his chair to grab his coat, placing the samples back into the drawer they came from as he did so. The case would have to wait another day, Nikki was more important. Straightening up, he slung a casual arm over Nikki's shoulders and began steering her towards the door. "Come on you, my place tonight for a pizza. I'm sure I still owe you one from some lost bet or something, so let's go, and no, before you even speak, I'm not taking no for an answer."

Nikki shrugged, giving him a watery smile and letting him lead her out the door. Together they locked up, neither particularly wanted to face an angry Thomas tomorrow, and headed for the car park. Jack decided that Nikki was in no fit state to drive, so after a lot of complaints and concessions about which pizza they would be ordering and promises to drive her to work in the morning at a time he couldn't even comprehend , Jack drove them both back to his little flat. "Wait, Nikki, how did you know I'd still be working?" Jack questioned, turning his eyes to look at her whilst still trying to focus on the road. "It's gone 8pm, any normal day I would have been home now. The Lyell wouldn't usually still be open this late, how did you know I'd be there?"

Nikki scoffed and turned to look at his face, dimly illuminated by the streetlights. "You know Jack, how did you know it was even you I was looking for? Could have been just a coincidence that you were there."

This time, Jack didn't even look at her, only raised his eyebrows. "Alright fine, I saw the light as I was driving past on my way home, and I guessed, well I hoped that it was you. Clarissa is at a dinner with Max tonight, and Thomas is looking after Rosie, so I figured it had to be. I couldn't face another evening sat at home by myself, so I stopped the car and guess what, I was right."

Chuckling to himself, Jack pulled up to his apartment determined to get the last word. "And why me? I hear Thomas is quite the hugger, why not find him instead?"

Nikki slammed the car door as she got out, huffing and grumbling at him, but Jack was sure he could see a hint of a blush on her cheeks.

…..

"I don't want to be too hard on you, but what are you going to do? Have you made any plans at all? Are you even going to tell Matt he's going to be a dad?"

It was gone 11pm, and they were both huddled up on Jack's sofa with empty pizza boxes littering the coffee table at their feet. For the past couple of hours they'd stuffed themselves silly (Jack complained endlessly about Nikki's 'healthy' choice of a vegetable pizza but ate most of it anyway), and watched one of Nikki's favourite black and white detective shows (Jack complained about that too, but of course it was all just teasing, he wanted Nikki to smile again even if it was over something small). Nikki groaned and sat up from her position under Jack's arm before answering. "I honestly have no idea what I'm going to do. He won't answer my calls or texts, and even if he did, I wouldn't know how to say it."

Jack was silent for a few moments. "Do you miss him?"

This time it was Nikki who was silent. "I don't know. Maybe, I'm not sure. It hasn't really sunk in yet. It wasn't good towards the end though, there were a lot of arguments. Maybe all I'm missing is that sense of stability, someone to call at the end of a bad day, that sort of thing. He didn't like that I wouldn't move to the US, he always said that a long-distance relationship was too hard."

"He didn't like you having your own life outside of him." Jack said flatly.

"Maybe not, but I guess I loved him anyway. Despite the flaws etc you know what they say. Guess he just couldn't be bothered." She stared back at the TV, her eyes shining with tears.

"Hey, I'm sorry, I never meant to upset you. You know your Lyell family love you. Ugh that was sappy, but you know what I meant, Clarissa'll adore being an auntie, she'll spoil that kid rotten. And you've seen me in action, if you want me to go give that tool a what-for, I will." Jack winks at her, turning off the TV. "Now come on, its late, and you need your beauty sleep. You know where my bedroom is, let me just grab some of my stuff and get you some clean sheets. I'm assuming you don't have any stuff with you, but there's a spare toothbrush in the cupboard under the sink, and some of Naomi's old stuff is still in the chest of drawers, third drawer down." This time it was Nikki who raised her eyebrows.

"Naomi? As in DCI Naomi Silva? Someone gets around, don't they?" Nikki grins, "wasn't that like two years ago now?"

Before she has a chance to frown at Jack's decision about the bed, he interjects. "Hey! I haven't had a chance to get rid of them yet, I'm sure she won't care. Don't even think about complaining about the sleeping arrangements. I can hardly let a pregnant woman sleep on the sofa, now can I? Gotta be all chivalrous." Nikki slaps his arm in mock anger and storms off to the bedroom. Jack yells after her, "if you dare wake me up any time before the sun does, I will kill you."


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's note: Sorry about the long wait guys, I've had 'exams' that then didn't end up happening thanks to the-virus-who-will-not-be-named, and I've been working a lot so dealing with all of that stress (along with my move to uni!) means I've barely even had a second to breathe. Thank for all your lovely comments and reviews, I never expected this kind of response and I loved reading them all! Anyway, I was inevitably missing Jakki after the realisation it would be so many months until we get to see them again, so I thought I'd write another chapter. Hope you enjoy! (Characters belong solely to the BBC and SW team)**

For the first time in nearly a year, Nikki awoke not to the sound of an alarm, but to sunlight filtering through the curtains. Blinking sleepily, it took her a few moments before she worked out whereabouts she was and why she was here instead of her bed. And most importantly, why she wasn't awake and at work already. She checked her phone and sure enough, her daily alarm had been switched off. That bastard. There was a hastily scrawled note on the bedside table next to a glass of water. Nikki grinned to herself, Jack was almost always late to work, clearly this had been written in a rush.

'Take as much time as you need, I've already let Thomas know you won't be in this morning. I know I promised to take you in this morning, but I decided you needed some rest instead. Feel free to get yourself some food and have a lazy day, you know where everything is.'

It was signed at the bottom with a J and a smiley face. Smiling, she swung her legs out of the bed and padded to the bathroom to splash her face with some cold water. As much as she hated to admit it, she needed this day to get herself together before she could return to work. She needed to accept her new reality; she was going to have to raise her son or daughter as a single mother, and her ex-fiancé wanted nothing more to do with her. Nikki almost burst out into wry laughter, this was so _not_ what she had ever envisioned for herself, but she figured that at least she had some sort of family to support her. The Lyell would welcome a new baby, especially one of Nikki's. Clarissa was constantly bugging her about when she would be settling down and starting a family (she adored children but could never have any of her own so Nikki's would be a good substitute), and Thomas, despite his tough exterior, was a real softie at heart. And Jack. Nikki had no idea what she would do without him, his laughs and his jibes, cheering her up when she most needed it. Reflecting on their conversation from the previous night, she also knew he was right (even though she would never admit that to him). She needed to talk to Matt properly, so he could understand and make an informed decision about what he wanted to do. Neither she nor the baby needed a timewaster in their lives, so he needed to make up his mind pretty quickly about his role in their child's life.

Checking the time on her phone quickly informed her that however much she wanted to get the phone call over and done with, she would have to wait; it was currently 5.20am in Washington. She shot a quick thank you text to Jack, who responded almost instantly with a no problem response (at least she knew her phone was actually working and Matt was just ignoring her messages), and headed to Jack's kitchen to get herself some breakfast. After seeing his meagre selection of 'food' (ready meals and various protein shakes) Nikki decided that she should probably head home. Jack had been unimaginably kind, but she knew she would feel like a burden if she stayed too much longer. It took her the fifteen minutes of having a shower, getting dressed and getting ready to go to realise that her car was still at the Lyell, and she would either be walking or hailing a cab. It was pleasantly warm for spring, and a walk would give Nikki some time to gather her thoughts so after tidying up a bit, that is what she did.

…

Rolling into the lab with the biggest smile on her face, Clarissa didn't even give Jack the chance to look up before she ambushed him. "No Nikki this morning then? Surprising that you're here and she isn't, especially if both of you were up all night!"

Jack rolled his eyes and went back to his samples. "Speak for yourself, wasn't it date night for you and Max? Anyway don't be ridiculous, Nikki had a bad day and just needed a friend and a place to stay."

Clarissa rolled forward and punched him lightly before her expression changed to one of concern. "Matt again? I know they've been arguing recently but I didn't realise it had gotten so bad?"

"That tool left her," Jack huffed, anger coursing through his body when he thought of how Nikki's tearstained face had crumpled over and over the night before. "He left her, and he won't answer her calls or texts, not even to hear her out. She needs to tell him-"

Jack stopped before he could reveal Nikki's secret, but Clarissa missed nothing. Her eyes narrowed and Jack squirmed under the intensity of her gaze. "What were you about to say there Hodgson? Is Nikki- no. She can't?"

Jack could see the exact moment when Clarissa realised, her eyes widening in her shock. "What is she going to do? Does she even want it?"

Her voice was lowered, not that anyone was around to hear it; Thomas was representing in court again, and all the staff were busy in the morgue setting up for an autopsy that was happening that afternoon. Jack slumped forward and groaned into the table. "I don't know, I don't know how to help her. You should have seen how devastated she was yesterday. I swear I could kill him for leaving her like this."

The buzzer for the front door sounded, startling them both. They exchanged a look, neither was in the mood for talking to clients, but they couldn't keep the visitor waiting. Sighing, with a look that told Jack they would be finishing the conversation later, Clarissa wheeled away.

**Sorry I know it's rather short, hopefully the next update will be longer! These characters own my heart and I want to treat them well, so let me know if you enjoyed this chapter and where you want to see Jakki's story go from here!**


End file.
